Exploring Life Directions
A reflective framework for navigating change
The turn of the year often arrives with pressure. To set goals, to optimise, to decide who you should become next. From a psychological perspective, this pressure is rarely helpful, and all of us have a January ‘fail’ story that shows we need more than just desire to make real world behaviour change.
Sustainable change is less about deciding harder or being more stoic and more about reflecting well, clarifying what matters, and shaping environments that support values‑led action over time.
Drawing on principles from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Designing Your Life, and Atomic Habits, this post outlines a practical, step‑by‑step process you can use at any time you want to take time to reflect on where you are currently in your life, where you would like to direct your life and how you might choose to build a path to a way of life that is more meaningful to you.
When thinking specifically of New Years this process supports you to:
Notice what has been helpful and unhelpful in 2025
Clarify values and directions for 2026
Explore possible future paths without premature commitment
Adjust environments and structures to support change
Take small, meaningful steps toward a values‑aligned life
This is not a process of fixing yourself. It is a process to help you realign your daily actions with a life you want to lead.
New Year often places pressure on us to make change in our lives. But continual reflection and adjustments throughout the year are more likely to support long term change.
Why Reflection Matters More Than Resolution
ACT reminds us that behaviour change is most sustainable when it is guided by values, chosen qualities of action, rather than rules, guilt or avoidance of discomfort. Similarly, Designing Your Life emphasises that clarity emerges through reflection and experimentation, not certainty. Atomic Habits adds that behaviour is rarely a matter of motivation alone; it is shaped by systems, environments, and small repeated actions. Together, these approaches point to a shared principle:
Change happens when values, behaviour, and environment are aligned.
The following five activities are designed to move you through that alignment process in a structured, compassionate way.
Activity 1: Reflect on What Actually Happened in 2025
Why this matters
Before deciding what to change, it helps to clearly see what has already been happening. From an ACT perspective, awareness is the foundation of psychological flexibility, we cannot choose different actions if we are unclear about what actions have been shaping our lives to this point.
Reflection also helps distinguish intention from impact. What we hoped would happen in 2025 may not be what actually unfolded, and that information is valuable. While we may have difficult emotions about our experiences in 2025, viewing our behaviours and the impact of them separate from these emotions allows us to gain data from which we can change or build new actions for 2026.
How to do this
Set aside 15–20 minutes and reflect with curiosity rather than judgement. Writing, rather than thinking, often helps slow the process.
You might consider:
Which activities provided me with a sense of meaning or purpose?
Which behaviours or routines supported my wellbeing or relationships?
Which patterns left me feeling depleted, stuck, or disconnected?
When did I feel most like myself this year?
When did I feel furthest away from the person I want to be?
Rather than labelling behaviours as “good” or “bad,” notice their function:
What did this behaviour give me? Was that important at the time? What did it cost me, and was that cost worth it?
This creates a compassionate foundation for change.
Activity 2: Clarify the Values Beneath Your Behaviour
Why this matters
In ACT, values are not goals to achieve; they are directions you move in, moment by moment. Values provide guidance when motivation fluctuates or life becomes difficult, helping behaviour change remain flexible and sustainable. While also directing our decision making and actions toward a more meaningful life. Values also help us understand that even unhelpful behaviours are often attempts to move toward something that matters.
How to do this
Using your reflections from Activity 1, look beneath your behaviours and ask:
What values were being expressed when life felt meaningful or life‑giving?
What values may have been neglected or crowded out?
Common values include connection, creativity, care, learning, honesty, steadiness, courage, or contribution — but the language should feel personally true, not aspirational. Values need to be yours in order to support meaningful action.
Some helpful prompts are:
In the areas of my life that matter most, how do I want to behave — even when things are hard?
When are there times in my past when I have felt deep meaning in the activities I was engaging in?
What would be a meaningful life look like for me if I was to look back on my 80th birthday?
Choose a small number of values to hold lightly as guides for 2026.
Activity 3: Use Odyssey Planning to Explore Possible Directions
Why this matters
Both ACT and Designing Your Life caution against prematurely narrowing options. Feeling pressured to choose one “right” future often increases anxiety and avoidance.
Odyssey Planning reduces this pressure by allowing exploration without commitment, opening space for curiosity, flexibility and learning.
How to do this
Create three brief Odyssey Plans — sketches of how life might look if different directions were prioritised:
Continuing on your current path with no changes
Making some meaningful changes
A curiosity‑led path without social, financial, or relational constraints — The wildcard
For each path, consider:
What might daily life look like?
What activities or roles would be central?
How might your values show up in this version of life?
The aim is not to decide, but to notice:
Which paths feel energising, heavy, interesting, or uncertain? How do they align… or not… with the values you want to lead with in 2026?
If there is a discrepancy, consider whether adjustments toward greater values alignment are possible. If total alignment isn’t possible, and it isn’t for most of us, consider what small changes you may be willing to make to help you move closer to alignment with your values. This isn’t about perfection, it’s about taking steps on the journey.
Activity 4: Adjust Structures and Environments to Support Values
Why this matters
Atomic Habits reminds us that behaviour change is rarely sustained through willpower alone. From a psychological perspective, behaviour change is rarely a simple matter of effort or motivation. Our actions are shaped, and often constrained, by the systems and environments we live within: work structures, caregiving roles, financial realities, health, relationships, and social expectations. When these influences are not acknowledged, people are often left attributing difficulty to personal failure rather than context.
Some systems may actively limit change while also reflecting deeply held values such as: stability, care for others, or responsibility. Part of reflective change involves noticing these constraints with honesty, discerning what can be adjusted, and holding what cannot be changed with flexibility and self-compassion. Without this broader view, it becomes difficult to realistically assess what is possible or sustainable over time.
How to do this
Reflect on 2025 and ask:
What environmental or structural factors made values‑led action easier?
What made it harder?
For the values you want to express more in 2026, consider:
What needs to be added, removed, simplified, or made more visible?
What systems could help (routines, reminders, boundaries, supports)?
Remember that changing structures and environments is itself behaviour change. Small adjustments often have a disproportionate impact toward our goals over time.
Activity 5: Commit to Small, Values‑Led Actions
Why this matters
ACT emphasises committed action choosing to move in valued directions even when discomfort or uncertainty is present. Small, repeatable actions matter because they build consistency, identity, and trust. As Atomic Habits describes, repeated actions shape who we become.
How to do this
Rather than committing to outcomes, choose one or two small actions that clearly express a value you’ve identified.
These actions should be:
Realistic within your current life context
Flexible rather than rigid
Meaningful even if progress feels slow
A helpful reflection is:
If I practised this action consistently, what kind of person would I be becoming?
Allow this to be an ongoing experiment rather than a test of success or failure.
Moving into 2026
You do not need to do everything at once. You do not need to have your life mapped out. When values guide daily actions, they naturally shape a life that feels meaningful and purposeful.
Psychological flexibility is supported by the ability to:
Reflect honestly
Choose values intentionally
Shape environments thoughtfully
Take small, committed steps over time
If the New Year brings uncertainty rather than clarity, that is not a failure, it is often the beginning of a more grounded, values‑led path forward. While New Year is a common time for reflection, revisiting this process every 3 months can help you stay aligned with the life you are building.
How This Work Shows Up in Therapy
In therapy, this reflective process is often slowed down and supported more carefully. Together, we might notice patterns that are hard to see alone, clarify values when they feel confusing or conflicted, and gently explore the internal and external barriers that make change difficult. Therapy can also support the process of committed action, helping you practise values-led steps while responding compassionately to setbacks, uncertainty, or emotional discomfort that naturally arise. This work is not about getting it right, but about building psychological flexibility and a life that feels more aligned over time.
This post is intended as general psychological information and is not a substitute for individual therapy or professional support.